Perspective

Change in Perspective

Rocky Mountains, Colorado

Rocky Mountains, Colorado

Aspens in fall 1 CW

Same mountain, close-up on a patch of aspens among the evergreens

My dog and I recently spent the afternoon at a local state park. As I took pictures of the trees, a lesson in perspective again asserted itself. All I had to do was move a few feet one way or the other to snap a dramatically different photo. Or perhaps I needed to change lenses to see something up close or change to a wide-angle lens to place it in a larger context.  The way a scene appears has everything to do with the photographer and his co-creative process with the landscape. Together we make the picture; neither one of us can do it alone. Where I stand or how I look at the landscape makes a big difference.

Aspens in fall 2 CW

same golden aspens and evergreens, different view

Sometimes I want to fix an uncomfortable situation, only to see that it really isn’t about me at all. I change my perspective showed me that I was too close to another person and simply caught in the cross-fire. It had nothing to do with me, so there was no action required. At other times, I look at a situation and think, “What if I looked at this with eyes of love?” Rather than take offense, which would just make things worse, what would happen if I chose to bring non-judgment to the table? I don’t have to give up a relationship because of one little tiff. We can work through it, with the proper perspective. Sometimes, I find peace with a situation when I consciously change my perspective to see what is right about a relationship rather than what is wrong. Suddenly, what I had thought was “wrong” just doesn’t look so bad.

Mountain in Fall 2 CW

Same mountain, shifted view to include neighboring mountain and swath of aspens

 

18 replies »

  1. I loved to read to my classes of young children when I was a teacher. Children’s literature is so wonderful and provides so many teaching opportunities. I would often ask the children to consider another perspective. Another view of another character. Soon some of the children would offer suggestions without being prompted. They particularly liked to take the side of the villain or the naughty one.
    Thanks for your ideas!

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        • Out of four kids, I have hopes that at least one will come through with grandchildren. They apparently listened to those lectures about getting a means of supporting themselves before having children, responsible sex, and finding a true partner rather than just someone. I still have one in high school and two in college. Sigh. I guess I still have a few years to wait.

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  2. I found people’s responses to your post quite interesting. I tend to agree with the one who said that mutual respect must be maintained. Understanding and having respect for various perspectives is an important quality in character. I can navigate difference and mis-understandings if I feel like there is mutual respect still in place. When I have the realization that respect wasn’t really there in the first place, I am out of the so called friendship. It is very hurtful to realize how many of our so called friendships are really relationships of convenince and which provide user-ability. Either I was too naive to recognize those when I was young or the world has just changed, but I have encountered more of the user friendships as I have reached the golden age. They can be very damaging. True friends stick with us when we are not our best, when we aren’t as stable as we really need to be …but its temporary; real friends understand our difficult moments and times. They help us get back to balance. Often they help us change our perspective or at best, enlarge it.

    I loved your landscape pictures. Landscapes are difficult to photograph. You did well. When we used to go camping, when you were little, I always loved studying the trees. They are so much like people with their various shapes and sizes. Some are perfect, some are deformed, some are stunted, some just flourish in spite of mis-shaping. I always thought it interesting how much density of the forest influenced the growth of the trees. Population density influences the way people develop as well. The leaves on the aspen trees always reminded me of dancing gypsies. Their leaves are so beautiful the way they move in a breeze like the bangles on a gypsy costume.

    Keep up the good work.

    Mom

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  3. One tiff is okay. Continual tiffs – not okay.
    I just ended a very long term friendship. Enough is enough. I found myself constantly “plucked”.
    Maybe some relationships/friendships have a time line. And, it’s very clear when you’ve exceeded it.

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    • Yeah, those are the kind where the change in perspective is to let them go. But I know some people who won’t even try to salvage the relationship. One argument, and they are not friends any more. Hopefully, middle ground can be found at least the first time or two. Not every relationship is meant to last forever. Very few of them are.

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      • Someone told me that friendships are like gardens. You have perennials, annuals – and weeds.

        I have found that even perennials can die.

        In my opinion, if one tiff ended a friendship – it wasn’t a friendship (?)

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        • I suspect it has a lot to do with what the tiff is about, how bad the blow-up, and why they were friends to begin with. How strong was the relationship? Friends of convenience that no longer were convenient? True best friends? Casual friends?

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          • In a nutshell:

            If you continue a friendship/relationship that has little or no respect in it, or unresolved, ongoing issues – you’re using that person for something.

            Or, they’re using you.

            Think about it. It’s true. How many relationships do people have – that annoy them, but they continue the “friendship.”?

            It becomes clear when you ask yourself: What am I getting out of this?

            Re-examine that question. If there is no mutual respect – it isn’t a friendship.

            It’s a matter of using someone – or someone is using you.

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